I am so sorry I have not written for a few months. I have been so busy going to "real" school and taking classes that are no longer pass/fail. I cannot believe how quickly this semester has flown by and that I am only 2 finals away (ok so 1 is a take home exam but you get the point) from being a Senior in college. I wanted to write a post because I have been feeling quite homesick for Perugia these past few days. My best friend Sam just returned from Perugia last weekend and it was so wonderful to see her again this evening. We talked about Perugia and hearing her say how sad she was to leave reminded me of myself just a few months ago. I still think about Perugia everyday. I think about gelato, the Italian lifestyle, and of course ciao ciao panino's (so yummy!!). I have also thought a lot about Perugia because just 1 year ago I was getting ready to leave on the trip of a lifetime.
I was ending my Sophomore year of college and I was so ready to leave for Italy. As next year's Fall students get ready to leave for Perugia I know it's going to be hard for me. I'm going to look back at my blog and find it hard to believe that was 1 year ago.
At the beginning of this semester I was told that reflecting on your study abroad experience was a good way to channel your sadness about being back in the US. One night in February I became very homesick for my Italian life that I did just that and I read that story again today. It helped me realize how much I have learned in Italy and I would like to share my story with you now. I am also hoping to make this into a digital story next semester with the help of the LVC study abroad director. But for now here is my story....
Coming Home
You know when you’re on a plane and you look out the window and see the white fluffy clouds? The clouds seem within reach; you can almost reach out and touch them, you swear you could sit on them if you had the chance. I saw those white fluffy clouds on September 2, 2010 while I was flying to Italy. I had decided to study abroad in Perugia because it was something I had always wanted to do. I was nervous and excited the day I left the Harrisburg airport. And I’ll admit I even cried as I hugged my parents and grandparents one last time before I went through security.
As I landed in Italy I immediately wanted to go home, I had never been so homesick in my entire life. But I pushed through the tears and sadness and let myself soak in the Italian lifestyle. Within weeks I had found my second home in Perugia. I was eating paninos, drinking cappuccinos, and walking the steep hills of Perugia with a smile on my face. I learned to adapt to a place almost 5,000 miles away from my home in Pennsylvania and I was no longer sad about my choice to live in Italy.
The months flew by and the final weeks of my stay came upon me so quickly. I realized I would never walk the hill to my apartment on Via Dell’Aquila again or eat a gelato from Agosto Perugina. On December 17, 2010 I said goodbye to my friends at the Rome airport much the same way I said goodbye to my parents only 4 months before. I saw those touchable white clouds again on the plane but this time I was not nervous or excited, I was sad and crying to be leaving Perugia, the place where I learned who I was.
I landed in Washington D.C. and saw a flight boarding for Rome only a few gates away. I started crying as I realized I was not able to get on that flight and experience what those passengers were feeling. I was not filled with joy as I reached the Harrisburg airport but filled with homesickness for a place I had only been for 4 months.
I cried on the car ride back to my house as I longed to be back in that place I called home. I cried with my Perugia roommates on the phone and through many hand written letters. It's taking me a long time but I now know that Perugia has changed me for good. I am not the same person I was back on September 2nd. I am no longer that scared or nervous girl who wanted to leave Italy as soon as she landed. I am excited in knowing that one day I will board a plane to a new destination. I will experience that giddiness as I try to reach out and grasp those clouds that once guided me to an experience I will never forget.
This story has helped me channel everything I have felt since coming home from Perugia. I still hope to go back there someday but for now this is enough. I should probably get back to doing my take home exam for psychopharmacology. I hope everyone has a wonderful summer and I hope to update much more during my time off of school!
Morgan :)
Morgan :)
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